


Lay All Your Love On Me

by ChingKittyCat, CobaltTheFox, Lavenderbirchtrees, SociallyUnacceptableOrb



Category: Hoshi no Kaabii | Kirby: Right Back at Ya!, Kirby - All Media Types
Genre: 4Kids Dub, Abusive Relationships, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Evil, Collaboration, Corruption, Creepy, Emotional Manipulation, Evil, F/F, Good versus Evil, Just a note; the manipulative relationship and what not does not refer to Garlude/Lady Like, Love, Love Confessions, Manipulation, Manipulative Relationship, Unsettling
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-29
Updated: 2021-01-11
Packaged: 2021-03-06 18:21:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 14,665
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26183341
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChingKittyCat/pseuds/ChingKittyCat, https://archiveofourown.org/users/CobaltTheFox/pseuds/CobaltTheFox, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lavenderbirchtrees/pseuds/Lavenderbirchtrees, https://archiveofourown.org/users/SociallyUnacceptableOrb/pseuds/SociallyUnacceptableOrb
Summary: Perhaps in adifferent universe, Meta Knight wouldn’t have accepted the proposition laid before him. But much to the demon's evident delight, he faltered and he’d caved. Now he holds the perfect trophy to accentuate his victory over the universe; the object of his obsession.-[Fic Art]
Relationships: Garlude (Kirby)/Memu | Lady Like
Comments: 12
Kudos: 54





	1. Chapter 1

It'd been a long night. A long day. Mostly a long night, because he'd been subjected to pure, violating darkness. The feeling of bugs crawling in his mind, sorting through the information he had on him for what felt like hours, days, maybe even weeks. He'd just laid down in the darkness, wondering what was going on, how long it'd been going on.

Then the darkness shattered, and he'd been returned to the light, fluffy cloud area that was his 'dreamscape'. Where there was a wizard. Meta Knight took to his feet, immediately alarmed by the sheer stature of eNeMeE.

He'd never seen the demon so large before. Normally, in Meta Knight's dreams, he was much more reasonably sized. The small stature usually kept the wizard very close, allowing Meta Knight to see every single feature of his face. It allowed the man to get upclose and personal, to the point where Meta Knight could've sworn he felt the other's breath on his face.

But now he was gigantic. He'd been growing in stature over the past couple of nights, the times that Meta Knight had seen him. Though it'd been minuscule, it'd increased drastically now. Tonight. Now, he was as big as a mountain.

And instead of the flat expression Meta Knight had found a normal in, he saw the wizard's horrible grin stretch from horn to horn. Looking up at it chilled Meta Knight, down to the bone. Such happiness, such confidence, it'd never been shown in eNeMeE before now. No, he'd never shown anything except flatness and maybe slight bemusement. Like when one would huff out of their nose at a joke.

"Meta Knight!"

The wizard practically squealed, his voice full of life and jubilance. Meta Knight took a cautionary step back, the warning bells ringing in his head as he tried to study the wide smile with an almost bug-eyed expression. That's the first time the demon had ever used his name.

"Look, look, okay, I wanna talk to you about something." 

eNeMeE's sudden lit up attitude did not quell Meta Knight's nerves at all. It was so out of left field he'd sooner see a bullet coming straight for him.

"Something..?" Meta Knight questioned back, softly.

"Yeah, something. I want to- listen. Listen to me. Right now."

"I-I'm listening. Just tell me."

He couldn't help let his voice crack under the pressure of an amused blanket demon. It's like someone had pulled a switch in his mind to have him go from hardened warlord to upbeat sadistic murderer.

"I want to help you, I wanna strike a deal with you. You're going to want to take it."

Meta couldn't help but twitch under his armor, hearing that happy voice. An amused voice. He didn't like it whatsoever, it made his skin crawl.

"Listen," eNeMeE emphasized, "I want you."

There was an awkward silence.

"You-"

"Okay, I don't think I was clear," eNeMeE corrected, "I want you to come with me. I want you, basically, to be in my fortress. With me. Right now. That's a thing I want. I want to spare you."

Meta Knight refused to stand down. He did not relax at the idea of being spared by this monster who'd taken so much from him.

"I'd rather die, thank you. I'm not like Yamikage, I'm not going to betray what I believe in for being spared." Meta Knight would've shaken his head, but he was too paralyzed to do anything.

Nightmare hummed, then laughed to himself. A nice, evil, horrible sounding chuckle. It was a very ugly chuckle indeed. Yes, about as pleasant and soft as construction noise.

"That's what I like about you. I like you a lot, Meta Knight.." 

eNeMeE grasped onto words, trying to form them before finally getting something, which he pushed out moments later.

"You make me happy."

The idea made Meta Knight sick. He especially didn't like how it'd been phrased previously, it almost sounded like they were romantically involved or something equally grotesque.

"I don't think anyone, anything has ever made me this happy in my entire life."

"Well, that's great," Meta Knight hissed, his stance and voice still defensive, "but you killed my friends, my family, all the people I fought with, and then some more. I can safely say that it's not going to be requited."

eNeMeE seemed to be vibrating from how happy he was.

"I want to grab you and bring you back to the fortress. Forever. I'll give you whatever you want, Meta Knight. Just come here and stay."

Meta Knight's eyes flashed red briefly at the offer the cheerful wizard proposed.

"No."

"Meta Knight," eNeMeE’s head cocked almost playfully, "you're being a bit selfish."

"I will not betray my values and beliefs just so you can 'have me'. Which is something I do not even want in the first place, I would prefer not to be tortured and maimed by you."

"I didn't say anything about torture."

"You wouldn't say anything about torture until I got there."

"If you wanted me to torture you I can add it to the list of fun activities for you once you accept my deal and come over."

"I'm not coming over, eNeMeE."

"Why?"

"What do you mean, why??"

"It's a good deal, and you should come over. I'm offering you anything you want. And I do mean anything."

Meta Knight paused at the statement, which only encouraged eNeMeE to speak further. 

"You'd sacrifice yourself for Jecra. I'm offering you a way to do it. Sacrifice yourself by coming to the fortress, and I'll bring him back. Plus your friends. Because I can do that, I have all the capability in the universe now that I've won the war."

Meta Knight's eyes went from eNeMeE down to the floor. He thought of Jack, of Garlude, of everyone else he'd known who'd just been swept away because of the very man who was offering to bring them back. Was it worth it? To bring them back into a world where Meta Knight was force to work for the side he despised, just to keep them alive and safe? Just to, most likely, have them put somewhere where they couldn't fight? Somewhere where they could only observe but never take the offensive to reclaim Meta's freedom?

"Jack wouldn't want me to.."

Meta tried to reason.

"Are you sure."

"Yes.."

"Double sure."

Meta Knight was quiet for a brief moment.

"The only way I would ever think about it is if you were to promise me their freedom, happiness, and for every single life you've ever taken to be brought back. Not just my friends and family or the GSA, I mean everyone. All the civilians, all the innocents."

"Can't you just settle for the people you like? Why do the extra ones matter?"

Meta’d met so many fantastic people, people he would’ve loved to know better. People he couldn’t, because they were ripped from life by the cruel tyrades and razing monsters this monster had created. His bodycount was endless, it was probably a more astronomical number than the amount of years this beast had been alive, period.

“They don’t matter,” eNeMeE pushed, “but I’m sure your friends matter. To you.”

He would not be bought with personal bribes. If he were to align himself with eNeMeE, everyone needed to be brought back, not just the people Meta Knight had the honor of meeting. Everyone, everything, and then Meta Knight would begrudgingly be his little slave. But that wasn’t being offered here, and chances are the wizard wouldn’t take too kindly to such a demand either.

It was either live and be his prize with limited luxuries, or struggle and die.

With his friends alive, at least.. They.. He.. He would have a fighting chance. They all would have a fighting chance, and if Meta Knight was as valued by the wizard as eNeMeE said he was.. If he could get close, stay close, and perhaps even..

A hot, sick wave of nausea travelled down his entire being as the wizard chuckled, amused by the change in Meta Knight’s eyes. He’d watched on fairly quietly as they shifted from their neutral yellow to an emerald green.

“Settle for the ones that matter.” eNeMeE commanded.

If he could just get messages to them, plans to them somehow.. If he could still manage something, like a plan, if he could get ahold of the wizard’s more valuable plans, of his time.. His stomach had dropped moments ago, and only just now had Meta Knight recognized that gnawing, dismal and resigned pain that would be sure to accompany him for the hours, days, perhaps months to come.

Meta Knight took a deep breath, and the beast twitched restlessly, anxious for his coveted response.

“I will come with you.”

“ **YES!** ”

The boom of eNeMeE’s voice forced a shockwave throughout the entire realm, whipping the clouds and destroying any miniscule fog. It blew back Meta Knight’s cape, making him skid back, but thankfully not fall over.

eNeMeE snatched him like a fish from a barrel; swiftly and without care for the fish. Meta Knight knew it was a dream, but the feeling of disgust and terror washed over him all the same as he was confined to the steel talons of this mass-murderer.

Meta Knight was brought uncomfortably close to the other man’s gargantuan face, as if he needed to stare him in that endless void he had for sunglasses.

“You are mine. _Mine_ , understand?”

Meta Knight only stared back, blankly. He refused to muster anything more than a curt nod, his mind curdling as he hissed and spat within the sanctity of his thoughts. 

“About your friends,” eNeMeE chirped, browsing through Meta Knight’s memories idly. The feeling of privacy was quickly shattered as the demon’s invasive magic twisted through Meta Knight, leaving nothing but insecurity, “I won’t have them scheming together, and you’re not going to visit them. At least, not without security, and me. Because as much as I like you, Meta Knight, I only like you because you put up a fight and are all honorable and stuff.”

eNeMeE knew that Meta Knight still wanted him dead, so at least there was that issue out of the way. He was a trophy, but an unwilling and nasty one. 

“So long as they are alive and allowed to live freely, without being enslaved by you.”

“Oh of course, Meta Knight. I won’t touch a hair on their heads. I don’t really care about them, you know, it’s all about you.”

Meta Knight did his best not to squirm in the hold while eNeMeE continued his romp through the knight’s memories. 

“I-I- we need to figure out what to do first, oh, this is so exciting! I didn’t actually think you’d say yes!” eNeMeE babbled, all but continuing to make his skin crawl. “This is so great, you know? You’re sacrificing yourself, oh! It’s like the ultimate failure! And you get to live through it! Yessss!!”

Meta Knight wouldn’t’ve been surprised if this guy twirled in glee from how absolutely overjoyed he sounded, but thankfully he had at least some pride and refrained from spinning the orb.

The violation of his memories stopped.

“I’ve found you.” eNeMeE almost purred. “I’ll come and get you, I’ll revive your friends.. Then we’ll see what we can do about getting you into your new role as my trophy.”

Meta Knight’s horror and revulsion was silent, and he pressed it down into his stomach.


	2. Chapter 2

“Get some rest, will ya? I swear, those dark circles of yours are starting to cover up your scar.” Jack called over to Yamikage. He chuckled a bit to himself and poured himself a cup of cocoa as he turned back to Meta Knight. “An apology! That’s a new one from him.”

Meta Knight shrugged and said, “There’s always a first time for everything, isn’t there?”

“Hey, I’m just glad that something's finally going my way.”

No sooner had he briefly tipped his mask up to take a sip then was he suddenly caught off guard by the blood curdling shriek of a Terrordactyl. It was an ambush! The question as to how they’d been found so quickly on an unconquered planet didn’t quite register with Jack until he’d taken up his sword, and by that point, it was too late for anything other than making sure he stayed alive.

The blitzkrieg raged on faster than he could react to it. Soldier after soldier ripped apart and blasted away before any of them had time to register that their allies were dwindling fast. Jack slashed and cut furiously, Trying to hit something, anything-

Talons sunk into his arm and lifted him off his feet, his other arm quickly being subdued the same. He could hear Meta Knight calling for him, but the shock alone paralyzed him into silence. The Terrordactyl cawed in triumph as it flung its prize out of its grasp and into its awaiting mouth, chomping down hard on Jack’s breastplate. 

The adrenaline kicked in, and Jack snapped back into lucidity. Though his arm was coated in stardust and pain wracked his body when he tried to budge it, he managed to plunge his sword into the beast's eye. It shrieked in pain and released him, and all Jack could do was hope beyond hope that his shield would protect him from the rapidly approaching ground.

* * *

“Ugh… alright, someone get the license plate of the starship that just hit me?”

Jack pulled himself off the ground and groaned, rubbing his temple as his vision swam. His legs ached too much to stand, and before he could try and reorient himself he fell hard on his back. His eyes popped open, the last of the visual static forced out of them by the impact. Instead of the inside of a cave, he was beneath a starlit sky that seemed to stretch on into eternity, with no moon or planets in the vast expanse of distant lights.

He rolled over onto his side and took note of the ground. It was pristine and patterned like a checkerboard. If he didn’t know any better, that demon beast had thrown him into a Novarite temple.

A temple with no roof or walls.

“And how hard did it hit me, cripes?”

Mustering the strength to get up, Jack groaned and finally got onto his feet. Everything on his body ached, least of all the cut on his arm, which had just barely scabbed over. His labored breathing was the only sound that he could hear for miles around, and he really didn’t want to think about how he could hear it _echo._

“Hey! Hello? If I ain’t dreaming, I’d like an explanation here!” He called out.

This time, his voice did not echo. It was almost as if the area itself was toying with him.

“Something about this ain’t right.” Jack mumbled under his breath.

“Oh, you have _no_ idea.”

The disembodied voice cut through the area like a knife, catching him off-guard. An echoing thump reverberated the area, enveloping it in sound. Jack’s hands clamped over his ears as the noise grew louder and louder, crying out in pain as the noise devolved into a low droning hum.

But the cacophony wasn’t the only thing keeping him on his toes; a thick, swirling fog with pink and purple hues were drawn out from the stars. It surrounded him and blurred his vision as its color shifted, meshing into vibrant blues and deep violets. What person, no, what _creature_ would need such an entrance? 

A shrill laugh echoed around him now as the clouds formed into a tower that burst apart at the top to reveal the cosmic scourge himself, gowned by his cape and obfuscating, roiling clouds. From inside those dark shades, one could see a terrifying glint of ambition.

“eNeMeE!” Jack shouted. He reached for his sword in his scabbard, but no sooner did he pull it out did it explode into a shower of light. “Oh… I’m in trouble.”

eNeMeE had waited for him to struggle, as he laughed at Jack’s misfortune.

“You look awful. Did you have a good little nap, hm? How did you ‘sleep’? Well, welcome back to reality, you worthless _creature_.”

“Good morning yourself **,** chin for brains. You figure out what’cha wanna do with me yet, or are ya waiting for a suggestion?”

“Let me set the scene for you here. You. Lost. There is nothing left for you out in the universe, no more battles, no more nothing. _Zero_. And you know why you’re not dead right now? You wanna take a guess? Just have a real good crack at guessing why you’re not dead.”

“You really want me to forward a couple guesses, pal?” Jack replied, trying to offset the dread with a few wisecracks.

eNeMeE was silent as he grinned expectantly.

Jack sat down again. In the oddest of ways, he felt like he was dealing with a small child; something he wasn’t quite sure if he’d fully been able to understand. That wasn’t going to stop him from pretending like he was one step ahead of this brute. Placing his chin on his hand, he returned eNeMeE’s gaping grin with a smug sneer.

eNeMeE’s face dropped. His gaping mouth shut and twisted into a frown.

“Yes.”

“Look, I’m not trying to play nice here-”

“No guesses means no answers. Period. I’m fine with leaving you wondering what’s going on.” 

“Where’s the razzle dazzle? Where’s the booming voice that kinda cascades into a shrill whisper, where’s the shock ‘n awe? I mean this, this is freaky, but I gotta say it’s kinda dull considering the things I seen just outside the tents at the camp.” Jack sighed. At this point, he’s not sure whether this is a coping mechanism for the situation he’s in, or if he’s being genuine. “You’ve lost yer edge.”

eNeMeE snorted with barely contained indignant anger. “You’ll get all that- you know what. Fine. Fine, you want nothing? You’ll get nothing. No explanation, no show.”

Jack blinked. “You’re just bored, aren’t you.”

“Oh, far from. There’s so little to be bored with now, now that I’ve won. Now that our mutual friend is on my side…” He’d made a caught expression, clearly a mock one from how he’d smiled sadistically right after. “Oops, I’ve said too much.” 

Jack went wide-eyed. “What.”

“No, no, you didn’t want an explanation! I won’t _bore_ you with the rest.”

“Never said I didn’t want no explanation, scumball! Who is it? Morgana? Jaiduul? Jeez, I wouldn’t even be shocked if it were Lancelot! Cause they’ve got another thing coming if they think-”

“So curious for someone who was so,” eNeMeE circled a now revealed hand around in the air to illustrate his searching for a word, “disinterested in what I had to say. I have to say, you hurt my feelings before, so unless you say _please_ , I don’t think I’ll tell you _anything_ now.”

Jack thought about what had just happened. Every little minute detail that eNeMeE could have possibly altered or manipulated in his favor. Every person that had looked at him funny or that he may have slighted in some fashion. The wizard towered over him, that horrifying grin of his never faltering.

“Tell me," eNeMeE pressed, "what do you think happened right before this little conversation?”

“Me n’ Masashi- ah, Yami just had a quick talk… and I sat by the fire to unwind. Then your goons swept in and-”

“And?”

Jack stared at the ground, not bothering to grace eNeMeE with the horrified look on his face. “I got snatched up. Swore that thing was gonna eat me alive.”

“How interesting. And by interesting I mean, well, pretty funny. I think that’s- yeah, that’s funny. Especially.. Hmm, well, I wouldn’t want to hurt your feelings now, would I? Oh, what am I saying, of course I would. But I shouldn’t tell you anything, really.”

There was a pause as he shakily took a breath.

“Why didn’t you let me die?” Jack asked hoarsely, looking up at him. “Who’d- What’d you have to gain from that?”

“What did I have to gain? Or _who sold you out_?”

“I’m the medic, ain’t I? Take out a couple guys, they’ve got reserves. Take out the guy that patches up the reserves… You went for the throat, but you didn’t commit. Why?”

eNeMeE looked as though he was thinking, but his smugness took a turn to annoyance as his smile twisted into a rather disappointed frown.

“You sure are disinterested in any real answers. But if that’s what you want to press, sure. You’re not dead because my- I say so, and I’m a demon made of fear, so all I have to gain is yours. You’ve already been scared just sitting here. Any more stupid questions and random tangents?”

“Depends. You gonna quit dodging the question?”

“I’m not dodging any question.” He said, dodging the question.

Jack glowered. “Who’s your contact?”

eNeMeE paused for a moment before a demonic giggle transformed into a snicker than rang in Jack’s ears, scraping at the insides of his mind.

“Oh, you know.. We’ve got so much in common. So strong, and man.. What a lucky guy. So lucky to join sides with me, to survive. Maybe this was his plan the whole time, I really couldn’t be happier. Got me a nice sword, too.. Even if it does mean you get to live, but let's be real, you’re nothing to me. Won’t ever really be anything. I’m getting off-topic, this isn’t about you. It’s about your good friend.” eNeMeE paused for dramatic effect, which was slightly hankered by his excited chuckles. “Meta Knight.”

Jack was quiet for a moment, his face dropping all emotion as eNeMeE chuffed. And then he burst into hysterics, cackling like a hyena.

“Why are you laughing.” eNeMeE’s smile twisted ever so slightly.

“That’s what you’ve been building up to? All that just for a terrible joke? Man, you _have_ lost yer edge! I should’ve seen that coming a mile away!” Jack coughed in trying to gasp for more air, far too amused by the ludicrousy of the situation. Once he’d regained his bearings, he continued with his mockery. “Oooh, yeah, Meta Knight’s _sooooooo_ evil! Ooga booga! Yeah, right. In your dreams, maybe.”

“It _is_ like something out of a dream..” eNeMeE murmured.

Jack’s face twisted with disgust.

“But, uh, well- that’s- you know what they say. Or, well, what, I’m going to say right now. First stage of grief is denial, so laugh it up. You’ll see your little friend’s face plastered alongside the galaxy’s most hated soon enough, once he’s properly into his new role. Right next to mine.”

“Alright, this joke’s got stale already.” Jack held up his hands. “Haven’t you ever heard of beating a dead horse?”

eNeMeE leered down at Jack, his smile not unlike something one would see on some cartoon villain or evil mastermind, waiting to see if the heroes realized their master plan.

“You don’t really expect me to believe that, do ya? I mean… not without… proof.” Jack’s tone took on a pleading whine. He felt like a scared little kid in front of this monster. A scared, helpless, lost kid. Were he any more desperate, he’d beg on his hands and knees.

“Hmm.. He’s busy. Like I said, you’ll see him again soon enough. It’ll be awful. But for now, I think that’s all I want to bother with in regards to you and your _friend_ over here. Not very talkative, is she? But oh well, I have heads to crack, babies to shake... and a trophy to get back to.”

“Friend?”

The room went dark for a second, as if all the stars in the sky had been blown out. And then there were only gunmetal grey slabs where the vast expanse had been. 

Smoke and mirrors.

The walls went up. Had he been in a simulation room this whole time? Jack looked to his right and saw Garlude. She kept her eyes on the screen, as if she were daring it to turn back on, daring eNeMeE to rub it in more. It was like her anger at him was the only thing commanding her to move forward.

Jack’s voice was low and scratchy as he called out to her. “Garlude?”

She did not turn. To Jack’s left, the wall slid upwards and revealed an entire army of faceless robotic drones, whirring and clicking in unison as they flooded the area. Jack’s vision was overcome with their stale grey monotony as he tried to muscle his way through the throng.

“Garlude! Garlude!” he desperately shouted over the noise. He could still see flashes of her lavender hair through the mass. Why wasn’t she fighting back? Why wasn’t she snapping out of it? Jack’s head swam with questions before he felt his arms violently seized and twisted behind his back in a vice grip. He screamed as he was lifted upward and dragged backwards.

“No, no, no!” Jack tried to squirm free, but it was to no avail. As he was pulled away from the drone as it rejoined with its identical brethren, he saw Garlude beneath the arm of another drone on the other side. They’d been brought together just to be torn apart, and eNeMeE was relishing every last second of their pain.

He’d finally gotten a look at her face; her pupils were glazed over and pin pricked, as if she’d been overloaded with so much information that her head would explode. Her gaze lifted to look him in the eye, and she snapped back into lucidity.

“Jack!”

The walls went down again.


	3. Chapter 3

The tailors were silent, not meeting his eye, keeping their hands to their work as they measured him. All he did was stare through them, feeling their fleeting hands work around him, and kept a steady gaze on the reflection of himself shown in the centermost full length mirror.

Meta Knight would have forgotten what his own face looked like if they hadn’t taken off his mask. Red, sore marks from his mask’s rim had left a circular impression upon his face in a rather comical manner that Meta Knight found to be completely without humor. Same with the mask-slit tan he had on the center of his face. 

Other than that, he still looked rather nice. The red mark would fade with time, and the pit in Meta Knight’s stomach whispered that the tan would fade too, under the fluorescent lights of this metal fortress.

The tailors were curt, and eventually, done. They mumbled some things to each other, then headed off somewhere else in the room. He stood there, dumbly staring himself down. If he were a sadder individual, he’d call the reflection that looked back at him ‘exhausted’. But no emotion came to him when looking into his own eyes, like his mind had gone blank, trying to think of all the things that had led to him being here.

As he’d watched the Destroyas approach his lone ship, encircle him, and bring him to his new life-long cell that was eNeMeE’s floating fortress, he had thought things. Kept his curses to himself as he boiled beneath his cape, any faint indication of dissatisfaction carefully suppressed. He’d cooperated with the pilots and security people escorting him once through the bay, then through the halls, he remembered how his hands had twitched when he saw eNeMeE again. 

He remembered as eNeMeE’s smile and nonsensical sentences grew delighted after Meta Knight had followed his command to disarm himself. He’d watched, watched, as eNeMeE scooped the legendary golden weapon into the black, endless void of his cape, whirling away through the stars until disappearing entirely.

As he’d thought of that now, his eyes did not narrow as he drew parallel to how Jack was taken. How he was whisked away into the black sky, until he was a pinprick amongst the stars, and all the knight had done was watch. 

The imagery reverberated in his head sickly, as he looked, and looked more at himself, as if he could find a satisfying answer if he just stared a little harder. His eyes had begun to unfocus, and he did nothing to stop them. 

Galaxia was a necessary sacrifice, Meta Knight was sure, and soon they would be reunited. 

Jack... was alive now. Garlude too.

Meta Knight felt new pauldrons being secured onto his shoulders. He put effort into re-focusing his eyes to see their design. They were much like his old ones, but with one specific difference. They were exactly like eNeMeE’s, only smaller. Forged for him. They had to have been pre-prepared multiple days ago.. 

He tried not to further disturb himself, instead watching the tailors secure his cape’s collar onto him once more— this one a brilliant crimson. Meta Knight was silently pleased as they’d followed his request for a new cape, but wholly disappointed about the freakish alternations preformed on it. It was a dark purple, adorned with bright yellow stars. He felt his face wrinkle and sag. 

If he were going to a funeral for his own ego, it was apt wear. 

While they’d adjusted it onto his person, he watched how it pooled on the floor, moving slightly with each little touch. It fascinated him more than anything else in the room, most certainly. 

One of the tailors brought his mask back up to him, fitting it back onto him and trying to buckle it. Meta Knight knocked their hand away to do it himself, tightly securing it to his face once more. And he’d wondered why those red marks had been there..

He appeared in the mirror, now clothed and clean of all the grime the war had left on his old outfit. He almost longed for the smell of mud and (what was probably) _excrement_ in comparison to the sterile, sanitized odor of his new uniform.

“One last thing, my Lord.” One of the tailors spoke.

Lord.. Meta Knight did like the title, but.. He'd prefer it'd be dropped until after he was out from this demon's grasp. He’d gently looked to them anyways, watching as they’d set out some new shoes for him. 

Shoes.. Uhm.. Hmm.. Was he supposed to just stick his feet in there? Was that all there was to it? Surely there had to be more steps, but this assistant was looking at him, expectant. With a demand to perform, Meta Knight did. He slipped them on, and felt himself grow a few centimeters taller thanks to the support of the boot. 

The door to the room burst open with spectacle as eNeMeE forced his way in. All the tailors jumped, and Meta Knight swung around to meet him. His hand went for Galaxia, though all he’d grabbed was a handful of air. Meta Knight tried not to think about it.

“Oh, look at you.” eNeMeE smiled, giddy. “You look amazing. Just like me, we’re matching, see? Though I have to say that cape is a bit..” He’d mulled over his words. “Tacky. Compared to mine, anyways.”

eNeMeE seemed expectant. Meta Knight would’ve bit his tongue if he had teeth. He had to spit something out, didn’t he?

“I had figured you would be one to appreciate the symbolism.” He’d answered after a healthy, awkward silence.

“I appreciate the rest of it.” 

eNeMeE had piped back, eagerly. His excitement seemed just hardly contained, as though any further snapping of his mental synapses would collapse him into a state of complete nonsensical mania.

“Of course.” Meta Knight felt that was enough. For eNeMeE, it was.

“Anyways, uh, yeah, let’s-” eNeMeE swept around the room, pushing Meta Knight harshly from the platform surrounded by the mirrors. “Let’s go. You’re all done here, so I need to show you where you’ll be staying.”

If his balance had been any lesser, he would’ve toppled to the floor. His cape swept behind him, almost cut by the wizard’s giant claws as he was shoved along. To save his new garments (if only to keep himself away from the prying of tailors again) he’d swept it around himself and joined his new ‘boss’ in stride the best he could.

Meta Knight had thought, briefly, of just jumping all the way up to the wizard’s shoulder, but brushed that under the rug. That was much too demeaning. He was no shoulder parrot, even if these shoes made him feel more weighed down when walking, he would trudge through exhaustion if he had to.

He faintly recalled someone, maybe it was Kit Cosmos, saying that ‘the journey is better than the destination’, or something to that like. Was that the case here, too, when both were equally miserable? Watching the blue fabric stars on eNeMeE’s cape while walking beside him brought him no peace of mind, and where they were going didn’t either.

“Do you want me to carry you?” eNeMeE breathed out, clearly seeing Meta Knight struggle to keep up.

“No.” Meta Knight snapped quickly.

“No _what_ , knight?” eNeMeE pressed, dangerously.

Meta Knight found it in his ego’s best interest to say nothing and keep walking. eNeMeE’s frown quickly turned as he’d laughed to himself. It was the sort of throat-kept closed-mouth laugh he didn’t want to hear again.

When they’d arrived, eNeMeE had unlocked his room for him. It had been kept behind a rather sci-fi looking door. One sort of door that could be sealed so tight that not even air would be able to escape it, if it was locked properly.

Meta Knight was pushed inside and saw what could only be described as a post-modern, minimalist, complete _garbage,_ room. It was an absolute disaster to all his senses, but mostly his eyes. Everything was over-designed (in an underperforming way, if that made any sense) and positively repulsive looking. It was an absolute offense to all the aesthetics his heritage had ingrained into his head as safe and worthwhile. Even a tent was more appealing than this egregious display of exorbitant wealth and lackluster style.

It was just a small foyer and living room, but Meta Knight didn’t doubt that the subsequent rooms (which there seemed to be a good dozen) were equally as ugly. He would’ve worried about what the kitchen looked like if there weren’t more important things to be mad about. The room was secondary to literally anything else ever that was currently happening.

“Well?” eNeMeE asked as he’d almost tried to slip himself in. He’d hardly fit a single hand inside, considering the room was actually, y’know, not made for hundred-foot-tall demon wizards. Instead, he settled for waiting outside.

“It is..” Meta Knight paused to think of ways he could put his opinion. “Livable.”

“It’s some expensive postmodern- you know what, good enough. Though I would’ve preferred some teary-eyed ‘oh, it’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen’, but that’s fine too. It’s- we’ll get there. Eventually, all that sorta stuff, we’ll get to it.”

Meta Knight wondered further into the room to explore what other ways his eyes could be repulsed today when he’d noticed a glass-thin, black device upon what he thought was a small couch-side table.

“If you look on one of the tables, there’s a tablet there.” eNeMeE continued. “Part of our deal, all that sort of stuff, so you know it’s being fulfilled.”

Meta Knight quickly found the power switch, and with a small wait to have the tablet show its logo— a silhouette of eNeMeE— it brought Meta Knight to a screen with multiple small, square buttons on it. One was labelled ‘GARLUDE’ and the other next to it was named ‘JACK’. Both buttons had eyeless depictions of their faces, drawn in a lineless, vector style.

Meta Knight had picked Jack first, watching as the screen loaded with bated breath. The video feed started out a little crusty, with pixels being chunky and visibility being rather poor. If it hadn’t been for Jack’s blonde hair, Meta Knight wouldn’t have been able to tell his pixelated appearance from the floor.

Finally, it loaded properly. Jack seemed to be well and healthy, being hauled along by multiple NME employees to... some destination that Meta Knight wasn’t particularly sure of. Jack kept his head hung down, though when he’d turned it skyward, it was almost like he was looking at Meta Knight through the screen. 

“Jack?” He’d mumbled, hoping for any sort of response from him, but not even a twitch or acknowledgement came back from him. 

“It’s a one-way thing, you can’t talk to them, but you can see them. Make sure they’re not dead, but I’m not letting you _scheme_ with them.”

eNeMeE almost sounded defensive at the end, like he’d wanted to protect himself. At least he knows Meta Knight still isn’t on the best terms with him. Not that he ever would be, but eNeMeE didn’t need to know that.

Backing out of Jack’s feed, he’d switched to Garlude’s. She was in a similar situation, though she went along far less limply than Jack. Her face... Meta Knight wasn’t sure what she could possibly be thinking. Jack’s misery was clear-cut, but Garlude appeared so overwhelmed by every single emotion known to existence, that he couldn’t make any particular one out.

She thrashed about, and was being restrained like she was some dangerous animal by half a dozen more people than Jack was being toted along by. It made his skin crawl, hearing her crying out and fighting, and knowing he could do nothing.

“I have people moderating those feeds too, like that, ugh, neon freak.. Real weirdo, that guy, I’ll tell you about him later, though. You won’t believe the sort of stuff that guy gets up to on his weekends. Anyways. Don’t even try any funny business, Meta Knight.”

eNeMeE paused for a moment, then started back up, in a flat voice that made Meta Knight’s body run cold with thoughts of the war.

“I think better of you, but I _know_ you hate me.”

A beat.

“Anyways,” eNeMeE chirped, almost aware of how deadly silent it’d been before, “you make yourself at home in there. It’ll be awhile before you get a new little pad. If you follow the rules, all that sort of stuff, I’ll reward you with a better room. Aren’t I generous?”

Meta Knight was more focused on Garlude’s war-cries and screams, to try and drown out his own rising adrenaline. 

eNeMeE chuckled to himself.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> SociallyUnacceptableorb here to say 2021 please GOD let me write more.

Garlude sat on the cot as she watched the smoldering planetoid die outside her window. Ripple Star had always been a lovely little neutral planet. She remembered how charitable its people were with donating food and supplies to not only them but shipping them off to displaced civilians. And now, for all their kindness and pacifism, they were being slaughtered.

Just thinking about it made every fiber in her body hurt. She tried to shrug it off and focus on something, no, _anything_ else. She looked down at her dress, the navy-blue fabric of it the same as Meta Knight’s cape, oh _stars_ , she didn’t want to think of what Meta Knight would think of her now. If eNeMeE was lying, Meta Knight was looking down on her with contempt. And if he wasn’t, well...

He liked to lie. He had to be lying. Meta Knight wouldn’t betray them.

Garlude felt a migraine coming on, another bout of sensory overload. She moaned and leaned back on the flimsy cot as she rubbed her temple. To her left was a small plastic remote with only three buttons. One to mute or unmute, one to change the channel, and one to turn it on.

Garlude didn’t hesitate as she pressed the button. Anything would be better than being stuck with her thoughts.  
“The power of D with all preservatives and all facts! Now with an all-new design that’s so comfortable and easy to open that even hot babes can crack open a cold one like a man! Power up D— do it like a man!” 

She had never been proven wrong so quickly. The advertisement faded out and an actual program faded in. 

**“¿Qué haces besando a mi hija?”**

The actor shouted emotionally. Garlude stared harder at the screen. She swore she had seen this actor somewhere else, the next shot panned to two other characters who looked similar but obviously wearing different clothes. The camera would go back and forth between the characters with the occasional close up. It was quite tacky. 

**“Así que era de este de quién estabas enamorada? ¡De** **_mi_ ** **Relaciones públicas!”**

The longer Garlude watched she made the connection; they were all played by the same actor. The guy in the advertisement, and then these actors in this trashy opera. Testing her theory, she flipped to the next channel. Now that same actor was the host of a game show.

  
“YES! KILL! “ The host shouted.

“Wow,” she scoffed to herself. “There’s higher production value in the commercials than the shows. This guy must be desperate if he’s showing up in everything.” 

“Now that's where you would be wrong-o, my _grape_ friend!“

Garlude’s blood froze. Her gaze was fully on the screen, and the man on the screen was staring right back. She clutched tighter the remote in her paw, but was too struck by fear to use it. Anything asides making eye contact with whoever this was seemed to take a herculean effort. But eventually, the words came to her and she spoke.

“Are you… talking to me?” 

“Now we got a winner! Isn’t that right, audience?”  
He followed with a hearty chuckle that echoed around the room. As the camera slowly panned around the set, deafening visual silence ensued from the empty seats.

“Who or _what_ are you?” She asked. Like hell she was being polite to some kind of television monster. As if being stuffed into a dropship wasn’t bad enough, eNeMeE had assigned her a roommate.

“Who am I? I'm everyone's good buddy! The face of the company! I’m what's happening, what’s hip, what’s cooler than cool. I'm Public Relationz! With a “Z”! 

Studio applause echoed through the room for only a moment until a bizarre midi file blared over the sound. Garlude clapped her hands over her ears and shrieked, the remote clattering to the ground as PR boogied to the heinous loud. The noise stopped, and Garlude looked up. She couldn’t tell if it was the ringing in her ears or the ambient noise from the television, but a soft crackling was all she could hear as the camera scanned the empty audience seats once more.

This time, though, it then switched to show the stage. Three podiums sat at the center. Behind the first sat a blue and silver suit of armor, crackled and half-eaten away by rust. In the middle was an axe with the skeletal remains of a snake wrapped around the hilt.The final podium seated a tar-stained cape draped over a mask that had been cleaved in half. 

_Irwindale. Mordred. Kingsley._

Any fear she’d had before was burning into rage. “What have you _done._ ”

He glanced at the players, a grin crawling up his cheek. 

“It looks like they didn’t quite make the cut.” 

Cruel laughter erupted from the corporate cronie.

“Answer me, you misanthropic excuse for a middleman.” Garlude growled.

“L-O-L!” He snapped his fingers, following it up with a finger-gun. “Don’t blow a fuse, Garleedle!” He’d said, wiping a tear from his eye. 

She hummed before an idea crossed her mind. When in Rome, do as the selfish creep feeding the poor gladiators to his lions would do.  
“I doubt you could have done anything to them,” she sneered. “You’re built like a flute... and covered in neons like a sign outside a grocery store.”

“That would be only half of it. Nah I didn't do this, but I _am_ in close kahoots with people who did.”

She raised an eyebrow. “Kahoots?”

“Kahoots, bro.” PR responded.

Garlude had no idea how to respond anymore, but using a threat was quickly becoming attractive to dealing with this soulless thing. 

“But less about you and more about me. I already am in the know about your life. ” He chided.  
“Of course you are,” With a sigh, Garlude rolled her eyes. “Isn’t this the part where you start monologuing?”

“Heck yeah my man! I’m the one in charge of making sure the company looks all fly with the crowd, since we’ve had some damage with you guys. Now that’s all wrapped up I’ve started my acting gig with you as my demo audience.”

Garlude’s jaw hung open before she quickly snapped it up. “Amazing. I don’t think I’ve heard anything weirder in my life. Are you _still_ acting?”

“Get the hint maaann, I’m not.” 

“I’m sorry. You don’t seem all that nightmarish.” She was being sincere; the sheer thought of Nightmare wearing a snapback or gaudy shades was more comical than scary, and she expected this guy to have dropped the chipper facade the second she took notice.

“It’s not my job to be. To you, at least..”

PR gives her a knowing smile. Small yet knowing clown.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“We’ll see, for now you gotta talk to the hand.”

Public Relations held out his hand with a smirk. The screen flickered and buzzed loudly, the dissonant midi file starting to fade back into the scene. For a split second, His body stretched out and grew larger, showing him hunched over to keep his face in frame. All she could see were a wide grin and three hands bursting from his body before-

The ship landed, cutting off any attempts by the still mutating creature to attack. His lavender face pathetically slid down the glass as Garlude stared. With a loud thump, the screen snapped to static as the television shut off with a sickening squishing noise. It was like some unfortunate meat sack had been stuck under a hydraulic press— what was that noise for? Before she could question it too much, however, she was caught by an additional surprise. The doors to her room opened, and in the hallway stood a tall black knight, armed with a shield that bore Nightmare’s logo. She gulped and rose to her feet.

“It’s time.” He barked.

“Yes sir.” Garlude sighed.

* * *

“Here at the NME genetically modified food processing plant, we have state of the art auto-feeding machines, so workers have no need for lunch breaks! It’s revolutionary, and our engineers are working on getting it installed across plenty of other planets. They did such a good job at it, I’m so proud of the progress all of us have made! You’ll have a lot of fun working here, Ms. Garlude.”

Garlude was being given a tour of the facility by two Waddle Dees. One sported a bow tie and power-blue skin, and the other sported a pair or horn-rimmed glasses and yellow skin. The latter was the former’s translator; she’d said something about him “not liking tall folks” or something to that measure. She might have found that insulting, but there were far more terrible things for her to notice going on around her.

Armed guards standing between every conveyor belt. Exhausted workers of all ages packed shoulder to shoulder like sardines in a tin. Corn cobs and apple cores lying at the workers’ feet, teeming with insects and maggots. How could the little Waddle Dees be so cheery if they could see they were working in conditions like this?

“...” The blue Waddle Dee looked at her emptily, waiting for a response.

Suddenly one of the machines backfired, and the worker using the machine began to panic, despair instantly filling her face. She desperately pounded on the side of it, her eyes darting around in horror as the guards around her took notice. The machine roared back to life, and the still quaking woman’s hands shook as she went back to her job as if nothing had happened. Not even the other workers had noticed her plight and had simply kept their heads low.

“...” Now the yellow was looking for some sort of approval or disapproval too.

“This is an… impressive show you’ve got here.”

“Quite! And it’s been fifty days since our last accident!”

A heavy crossbow bolt sunk deep into one of the burlier guard’s throats. He fell to the ground lifeless as his fellow guards began to panic. Moral Support remained dissantly cheery as more bolts fired into the smokestacks and began to flash red. She’d only a second to duck before they exploded as well, sending the factory into a frenzy.

“And it’s been zero days since our last accident!” The translator chirped, uncaring of the chaos.

“It’s not an accident!” Garlude shouted. She looked up from where the bolts had been fired. Atop empty scaffolding stood a hooded figure holding the alleged weapon, who recoiled immediately upon being seen and fled. Garlude narrowed her eyes and growled. “This was planned.”

Garlude drew her sword and darted up the ladder. She didn’t really want to hurt this innocent person, but the least she could do was fake it. She pursued the caped figure as they darted across the scaffolding, the exhausted workers somehow managing to crane their heads up enough to stare captivated. An open window, undobutledy the one they’d entered through, shed light on the otherwise dull interior. But before they could leap through, Garlude grabbed their leg.

“Alright, I’ve got you! You’re…” Garlude found her train of thought derailing as the mystery person’s hood fell.

Bright golden hair curled back and cropped short to avoid any prying clutches, the same uniform as the poor workers, stained with the oil of the security drones and emblazoned with an upside down star, and soft brown eyes meeting hers. The light coming in from the window illuminated her features in even further clarity, and Garlude’s jaw dropped. An urban wasteland was hardly any place to find beauty in, and yet she was dumbstruck.

“You’re…” She was barely able to gasp out the word as her grip loosened.

Garlude’s split-second hesitation was enough for the unknown assailant to take advantage of. She wrestled her ankle free of Garlude’s hand and booted her in the snout, knocking her onto her rump. The room swam as that blue Dee rushed to Garlude’s side and squaked to the interpreter next to him. Garlude didn’t care about the duo; she only cared about the woman escaping out the window and disappearing from view.

“Maaaaan,” Garlude droned as a single droplet of blood dripped from her nasal slit. “Talk about a knockout.”

Her head smacked against the ground as she passed out, the sound of the other guards panicking and machinery whirring slowly fading out with the rest of her lucidity. For once, Garlude was happy that she couldn't forget anything. She'd keep that pretty face in her mind forever.


	5. Chapter 5

Public Relationz was by no means eNeMeE’s favorite, but by some unfortunate miracle he always knew where eNeMeE was. PR was similar to the other corporate cronies in regards to his build, however PR could be easily distinguished from a crowd. He wore a jacket that had resembled the pattern of a bowling alley carpet, paired with a mismatched dress shirt and bowtie, and to top it off he adorned a blue baseball cap that slicked his frost-tipped hair back. 

PR decided, after a long day of harassing Garlude, he would consult eNeMeE for a business pitch. 

He found himself at the entrance of a design studio and promptly allowed himself in, the designers who had previously been preoccupied with their own conversations were stunned in silence by Public Relationz. They gasped in horror, some of them cringing at his clothes as he passed them. He didn’t mind, his main concern was eNeMeE. The abruptness of PR’s entry didn’t disturb eNeMeE in the slightest, the mannequin that held Meta knight’s old armor had completely engrossed him. PR decided to take a different approach, and forcibly made his presence known.

“BOOYAH, BAY-BEE!”

PR shouted with his arms outstretched, a silence filled the room. He could feel eNeMeE’s face twitch in annoyance, he knew this routine and he was going to keep with it. 

PR tried to focus his attention on whatever it was that had captivated his boss, since he didn’t even glance at his direction. 

It was a pitiful thing to look at, the armor on that stand. The pauldrons were dull, the guilding even began to chip and a mark where a star had once been was made apparent by the star’s absence. The cape was another story, the fabric had begun to unravel at its tears, its embroidered edges had bursted from wear, and worst of all it reeked of sweat and mildew. All but one thing on the mannequin was genuine, Meta Knight’s mask. It had all of the wear and tear of its original, however if one were to take a closer look they would see it was made with a sickly, easily breakable plastic. A strange parody to match eNeMeE’s obsession.

“So, I want a suit too for him.” eNeMeE still ignored him. “I know suits are in fashion right now, everyone’s getting a suit. I want him to have one, real nasty and sinister looking one. Can he get some spiked shoulder pads with it too? Though I guess he doesn’t have shoulders.. One of you will figure it out, he’s got these shoulder armor things and all that other stuff too, should work.”

PR rocked back and forth on his heels.

“So what’s the four-one-one for this big guy, huh? Got any new tricks up your sleeve?” PR grinned. “Or lack of sleeves!” PR wheezed out as if it were the funniest thing he could imagine. 

As the designers laughed among themselves, eNeMeE dragged his hand down his face, his hand resting on his chin as he finally turned to PR.

“You know better than to waste my time when I’m busy with something important, you tiny little wannabe  _ cool-cat _ . I don’t have time for your dumb little one-liners or jokes, so what do you want. Make it snappy. Go.”

“Well, I met my quota for the millenia and get this,” He paused for dramatic effect. “The ratings are up on ‘NME’s Funniest War Videos’!”

eNeMeE glared at PR, clearly despising every second of PR’s presence. Being fully aware of this, he continued further.

“The viewers seem to take a liking to that funky blue one but I don’t see the appeal for someone who’s such a  _ squaaaaaaaare. _ ”

Whipping his hand from his cape, eNeMeE’s fingers crackled with electricity, and he flung whole lightning bolts at PR. PR casually maneuvered himself out of the way by breakdancing. 

“Jeez. Tough crowd.” PR said flatly.

eNeMeE let out a long sigh before he muttered something to himself, regaining composure, as he tucked his hand back into his cape.

“Let me put this in a language you’ll understand.” Nightmare took a babying tone. “You keep talking.. And you’re cruising for a bruising.”

Before eNeMeE could notice, PR opened his mouth to respond with something even more foolish, however he decided against it. It was now extraordinarily easy to work up his boss, knowing that he would never truly receive any repercussions for it. He only looked up and smiled at the wizard. ‘No matter what, I'm still a valuable asset’ he reminded himself.

_ ‘ _ “As if! I know better than to run my mouth around you, Mr. Boss Man.” PR said, raising his hands in defense. 

“How about you run your mouth about why you’re here. You seriously can’t have shown up just to tell me about some television show rating being good.”

“It's not just any television show, It's YOUR television show that's all the rage-” 

“Shut up, PR. I don’t care. I ‘ought to put you in the Clown Room for wasting my time.”   
“I can’t get lost in the mirror maze again!” 

The room filled with an artificial laughter coming from the designers that could be best compared to that of a sitcom laugh track. eNeMeE, however, remained indifferent. 

“So what’s the dealio with you?” 

“ _ PR _ .”

In a half-efforted attempt on PR’s life he flung another attack and missed within mere inches of PR’s life. The nature of their relationship is clear, PR thought to himself. Avoiding the hole that eNeMeE had blasted into the ground, he marched to the Meta Knight mannequin and took a good hard look at it scratching his chin.

“Huh. What a real piece of work, but you did get to him didn't ya?” PR scratched his chin. “So, when do I get to meet him? I wanna see if he's all that and a bag of chips as you make him out to be!”

eNeMeE only squinted at PR. PR squinted back. eNeMeE sighed, but took the opportunity anyway to talk about Meta Knight at the given chance. 

“He’s getting adjusted to his surroundings right now, scoping out his room, the people, all that other stuff at the moment. Like a- you know- uh- frog in water before it starts boiling and it doesn’t hop out. I think if you go and meet him now, you’ll scramble his brain and make him want to..” eNeMeE grumbled, almost like he’s trying to not say what he’s about to, “ _ CTRL, ALT, Delete _ himself. So I would prefer if you kept your distance, at least until he’s a bit more... with the program.”

PR nodded sagely, and tapped his glasses. He thought of the knight eNeMeE was so infatuated with and devised a plan. 

“I think there's a little more than meets the eye with our little blue buddy.” He chuckled to himself.

“Wow. Fantastic deduction. Where would I be without you.” All said flatly, but then eNeMeE paused. “He’s different, though, yes. No one else has- no one else lived through the war other than him. There’s something about him that inspires..” Nightmare gestured vaguely at the air, not even looking at PR, just at the mannequin with the knight’s clothes. “Something.. I don’t know,  _ something _ . It’s something. And- well, you know. Considering everything, something was- is- yeah, is- it’s better than nothing.”

PR got the notion eNeMeE was about to go on about one of his Meta Knight rants, in which it honestly annoyed him considering the war was won and over with. So he decided to pitch his idea before the opportunity escaped him.

“What if I keep an eye on him?” 

“I wouldn’t ask you to, you already have his worthless friends to deal with.”

“True that, Mr. Blanket Boss, but Garlude is  _ too  _ easy to buzz off and Jack is as interesting as a loaf of white bread.  _ No sir!  _ Let me look after  _ him _ and I promise you, he’ll become loyal as ever… as loyal as  _ me _ .” He winked as he lowered his glasses.

eNeMeE pondered it, seeming to calculate the words PR just said. 

“I want him loyal. More loyal than a dog, and more loyal than you. You better not rub off any of your ‘funny’ quirks on him. If I let you babysit him, I wouldn’t want you to  _ soil  _ him as he is right now, he’s..” eNeMeE trailed off.

PR rolled his eyes behind his glasses but continued to humor the wizard man. 

“So you think I'm a bad influence? That's a little uncool of you.” 

“I think you’re an obnoxious influence. How bad you are makes no difference.”

“Well here's the deal,” PR took off his hat to briefly run a hand over his bald spot, “After we know Meta Knight won't betray us I can stay out of your hair for until he bites it or whatever.” 

“I don’t want you to  _ taint  _ him. I don’t want you doing anything to his personality, I don’t want you to influence him in any way other than loyalty. If you do, if- if he starts spouting awful one-liners, or says ‘radical’ at any point in time ever, it’ll mean your head. Understand?”

“Ye.”

“Fine.” eNeMeE chuffed. 

“You wont regret it!”

“You say that  _ now  _ but..” The wizard was less than enthused, “He better not end up in an ugly snapback like you.”

* * *

eNeMeE’s command was one that Meta Knight had felt rather uncertain about. Not because it was something unseemly, thank goodness, but the complete polar opposite. Something incredibly mundane; go meet someone at a location. Be punctual, be polite, and be passive.

eNeMeE seemed off about the way he’d described the individual. It was so vague that anything could’ve been derived from them, but the grimace across his face when mentioning the person’s name— Public Relations, or PR for short— told Meta Knight just about everything he’d needed to know.

He could only hope this ‘new supervisor’ didn’t have as many screws loose as the demon did. If he was stuck with another creepy obsessive ‘fan’, he didn’t know how he’d keep up any of his hope or lingering, string-thin feeling of privacy and safety.

As Meta Knight located the maw of what was crudely described as an ‘entertainment venue’, he’d looked upon the door. Well, ‘door’ was a rather generous term. It was a hole in the wall shaped like the jaws of a monstrous beast, metal spikes sticking from the floor and pointing outward, painted black and entwined in gaudy, slowly shifting neon colors. 

He’d thought, briefly, that this perhaps was a real monster, but considering how he saw movement from inside the ‘throat’ from another customer, he’d doubted it. With not a second glance, he’d entered, eyes adjusting to the low light of striped neon-lined walls and dark-lit carpeted floors decorated with various squiggles and shapes.

When he reached the end of the throat-hallway, he’d pushed through the double doors at its end to reveal the belly of the beast. The size of the establishment made him reel, and the scent of the place hit him with a wave of nostalgia. It smelled exactly like the arcade on his home planet, minus the sewage issues. 

The arcade on his home planet, bustling with fellow kids ready to play the newest games that’d been exported from the other side of the content, lining up their money on the screen and (sometimes) patiently waiting for their turn. There was never a boring day in there, at least when he was able to go.

Arcades were bustling with noise, of joy and sorrow, but this one hardly had anything other than the sounds of dejected cabinets playing their opening cutscenes over and over again, trying to attract a player to them. Some were lucky enough to have a rather miserable looking customer smashing at the buttons and joysticks, though the vast majority were left sorrowfully alone. But he wasn’t here to mourn over the lack of joy in here.

Perhaps the employee at the counter knew who PR was. Meta Knight wasn’t about to bother someone who was in the zone. However, as he’d neared the quarter exchange, the person behind met his eyes, widened theirs, and quickly excused themselves into the staff room. Meta Knight waited patiently there for them to come back, but after multiple minutes, he figured searching out PR by some other means was better. Surely he’d be able to recognize him when he saw him, despite the lack of physical description given by eNeMeE.

He quested through the empty lines of the cabinets, searching out his ‘superior’ with a quiet but judgemental gaze. Most of these people at the cabinets quickly averted their gaze after they’d heard the soft steps of the knight, as well as the clack of his armor and necklace. None of these people could’ve been PR.

Meta Knight decided he’d needed a more direct approach. He’d internally discouraged himself from being rude, but he steeled himself knowing that all of the people in here were evil. He’d approached one particularly odd looking customer— who wore a coat with a pattern that looked like the arcade’s carpet— from the back. They were absolutely wrecking shop at the game they were playing.

“Excuse me, but do you know-”

“You must be Meta Knight.” 

Immediately, Meta Knight’s noted the lack of the player not calling him ‘Lord’ Meta Knight, like the tailors had. Seems someone’s a bit disrespectful, but Meta Knight honestly knew that title wasn’t the most deserved in this situation.

“..May I ask you some questions, once you’re done?”

“I can answer them as I’m playing homeslice, shoot.” The man’s not even looking at him, just keeping his glasses-covered eyes on the game. Talk and game at the same time? Impressive, considering the skill he was so casually displaying.

“I am meant to meet an individual here by the name of ‘PR’. I was unfortunately not given a description as to what he looks like. Would you happen to know him?”

“Oh yeah I know that guy,” he didn’t even stop playing as he turned his head back slightly to the knight, “I am that guy.” 

Adding to Meta Knight’s continued stunned state, PR focused back on his game.

“Ah. I.. See.” Meta Knight said.

PR seemed like the sort who took pleasure before work. Perhaps that’s why eNeMeE didn’t like him; he was lazy. Hmm, perhaps he’d be more tolerable to work with than Meta Knight first assumed.

“Since our introductions are out of the way, PR, would you know the reason as to why the other individuals in this establishment refuse to make eye contact with me? I can only assume as to why.”

“Crazy you say that, cuz’ they do that to me too. But that’s an everyday thing for me.” PR chuckled.

A beat of an awkward silence as Meta Knight’s eyes briefly wandered to the other side of the aisle.

“I see.”

“You see?” PR pressed.

Oh, so he’s  _ smart _ . Lazy and a bit of a smart alec... okay, maybe he’d thought too soon when he thought he would be tolerable. No, Meta Knight, it’s just one sentence. No need to condemn him... yet.

Best not to enable him.

“I am here at ‘eNeMeE’s’ command, he told me to come meet with you, as you will be.. Observing my activities. Is there anything in particular that I should know?”

PR, still playing, briefly tapped on his chin.

“All you need to know is that eNeMeE’s a little busy. So! As much as he’d  _ love  _ to see you, I decided to take the reins for a bit. See how to market myself to the recent deserters of war.”

Yeah, no, he thought too early. This guy’s a jerk. If this were a different circumstance, Meta Knight wouldn’t mind wrapping his hands around PR’s neck and shaking him like a limp puppet, his limbs flailing haplessly.

That could wait, though. Meta Knight was a good boy and kept his aggression to himself, his anger not even surfacing in his eyes. There’s not even anything he should be mad about, in this little persona, because by all means.. PR was correct. He was polite. He was passive. He’s normal, yes.

“One would think you would have already learned that, as  _ certain people _ joined NME before I did.”

“Ah but that's part of my genius!” PR made a motion. “You see, if we are thinking of the same certain Yam’... He wasn’t so willing to talk to me, something about not wanting his morals to be dirtied or whatever.” 

Meta Knight scoffed. Ah yes, the pinnacle of morality that was Yamikage, not wanting to be sullied. Truly had full reason to be worried.

“Very interesting,” said flatly, “and I am  _ sure  _ that worked out for him.”

“Though, when he did switch sides he was a real-know-it-all, always having something to say about the GSA being  **bad** and  _ evil _ , yadda yadda yadda. I liked when he went on those rants because he really was saying a whole lot of nothing.”

Meta Knight’s mind wandered upon a brand new idea that made his stomach tighten. He kept himself composed, though ideas of Yamikage running around the facility now came bursting into his train of thought like robbers. 

He could only hope eNeMeE wouldn’t want a brawl between the two of them to break out. He can think of no other way he’d prefer for a confrontation to finish.

“Where is he working in the company now?”

PR shrugged, making an ‘I don’t know’ noise.

“Who knows.” PR wistfully sighed, almost dramatically. “I couldn't keep a good eye on him, so I thought to myself; I won't make that mistake again.” 

PR’s button mashing was getting to be a bit more forceful. Redirecting his attention back onto the game, Meta Knight noted that it seemed to be getting more difficult. Perhaps PR was almost done.

Meta Knight got the feeling that once he was done, he wouldn’t be getting away from PR’s soon-to-be-known prying eye. Great. Thanks, Yamikage, for making him not lazy. Fantastic... now PR’s an obstacle that needs to be properly removed.

“I have not been given any particular duties by eNeMeE at the moment,” Meta Knight decided to change subjects, “do you know what you will be overseeing in regards to me?”

“With the way you’re going about things I think I’ll have to stick around you. Y’know, since you seem very  _ not  _ loyal.”

What, was it that obvious? Well, probably. Uhh, he should do something about that-

“I'm just kidding L-O-L!!” PR snickered. “You take everything so seriously!” 

Meta Knight breathed a slight internal sigh of relief, though now there was a nice, awkward gap of silence as he’d tried to think of what else to say to this.. Weirdo. Yeah, no getting around it, PR was a bit of an oddball. The outfit, the demeanor, all of it was a tad tacky, odd, and a bit evil. 

PR finally finished the level he’d been playing the entire time they’d talked, his character walking off the right side of the screen triumphantly. Some victory music played, a swift cut to the ‘you win’ screen, then a snap to the leaderboard.

All the entries were the same. All of them under the same name— the same one that PR punched in— ‘PRZ’. The Z must’ve been just something to fill the mandatory third letter that the board demanded of him.

Today’s play session landed him in 6th; no small feat considering the astronomical number that was his score.

“You seem to be quite skilled at games.”

“Not just that one.” PR smiled, good-humoredly as he’d finally turned around to look Meta Knight in the eye. He leaned back on the cabinet with both of his elbows.

The screen went dark as it attempted to load up the main menu again, and for a brief moment, Meta Knight saw his reflection in that once bright glass. It was a bit diluted and blurry, same with the reflection of PR. 

PR’s distortion on the glass seemed a lot worse despite the fact that he was closer. His arms looked a lot more thin within his coat sleeves, and the back of his head looked a lot more shaggy than Meta Knight recalled. 

He had good eyesight, he doubted there was any trickery on his part happening. Though, as the main menu appeared and the reflection left, he felt no need to bring it up. 

Meta Knight knew he was dealing with evil individuals, and another evil man stood before him. One that allied himself with eNeMeE, one that’s been around the block more than once, and one that a demon trusted enough to make sure Meta Knight didn’t goof around.

Mysterious traits and messed up reflections were the least of Meta Knight’s worries.

“All. Sorts. Of. Games.” PR enunciated.

* * *

They’d decided to move somewhere more professional. PR insisted on going on ahead, to get everything all nice and ready for Meta Knight. Which Meta appreciated, if only for the fact he’d have some blissfully quiet moments to himself on his way there.

Meta paused before the door of PR’s office. He was almost thankful that their next meeting was somewhere more official than the last, but considering the brief glimpses into PR’s personality, he doubted the professional setting would make any major changes to the man’s demeanor.

It was far less oppressive or skin-crawling than eNeMeE’s, so Meta would rather deal with it. Though, that’s like saying he’d rather step on hot coals than get branded or flayed. 

Knowing he was on company time, Meta took all the time he could to delay himself before pressing into the room. The automatic door bid him welcome by sliding aside for him, letting him carefully observe the interior.

It had much more personality than his own room; far more decorated. A large lava lamp that stemmed from the floor and reached from the ceiling covered the room in a cyan hue, and the neon, magenta sign reading ‘Radical’ above PR’s desk did nicely to add to blend the dimly lit atmosphere into a mirabella purple. 

The lava lamp and neon sign were not ill-placed amongst the other items, some being an arcade cabinet, bean-bags, pop-corn machine.. It was as though PR lived in his own personal circus, and he was the only performer. 

The clown sat at his desk in his rather villainous looking chair, playing with some sort of oil and water toy. When Meta entered, he perked up, took his feet off the table, ventured out of his chair and around his desk to meet Meta more closely. 

Meta watched as he stepped in spilled popcorn, PR unphased by the crunching under foot. 

“So! You finally took me up on my offer to meet up on better terms!” PR sounded rather excited now that they were properly in his domain.

“You requested my time, so I am here.”

“Well, I’m glad to have ya!”

PR backed up towards his desk again, seeming rather indecisive and restless in Meta’s opinion. He plucked a small cube from the edge of the table and hucked it at Meta. He’d caught it with no hesitation.

“Is there anything in particular you wanted me here for?” Meta had nothing to do with the little puzzle cube PR had tossed him, so he quietly looked for a place to set it down again.

“I just wanted to do a little bit more chit-chatting, since l didn’t do that last time.” PR sounded rather matter-of-fact, for someone who was at fault for not chit-chatting before.

“Yes, I found you were rather.. Distracted.” 

“I was in the GAME zone! Yeah I could hear ya’, but I couldn't listen.” 

He stared through PR. It was this man’s decision to be in an arcade, and then not wait to stop playing his game before they properly talked. PR had been in the ‘game zone’ of his own accord, and- it just now occurred to Meta that perhaps this was all just one big waste of his valuable time. PR was probably wasting it on  _ purpose _ .

“Anyways!” PR decided to fill the awkward silence. “I hear you’re a lot younger than me which is  _ Cuh-Razy _ .”

Meta was far from young. At least, by most species standards. It took hundreds of years for Batamon to mature, and he was well up there, considering he was an adult now.

“You do not appear to be older than me. I thought you were around my age, if not younger.”

PR scoffed, like the knight was an idiot.

“I  _ know  _ I’m older than you, I’ve been around since this war started.”

Oh? Now that’s something.. He would’ve never guessed that on his own. If he was bumming around since the war started, and if this is how he’s like after a few millennia of aging, he could only imagine how much more insufferable PR was back then.

There was something more important at hand here, though. If PR had such a long lifespan, and he was working for eNeMeE now, had he always been, or was this a more recent development? Something worth investigating.

“You’ve aged well, then.” Meta stated flatly, eyes emerald green.

PR made  [ a face ](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/744575462755401749/753197739566956564/bernie.png) . 

“ _ Listen _ Mety,” PR sounded like he was amused, shocked, and perturbed at the same time, “scrubs arent my type and I don't think eNeMeE would like to hear that you’re bein’ a simp for me already.”

What in.. Is PR speaking some alien language? What’s all this jargon he’s spewing???

“What??” He felt it needed to echo his confusion out loud.

PR cringed, looking like he’d realized something, but it was a complete mystery as to what. To be honest, Meta wasn’t sure if he needed or wanted to know. 

“I don't know, you’re acting a way towards me.”

Meta, still holding the toy cube, remembered its presence as he’d tried to confusedly gesture.

“Okay??”

PR took a deep breath.

“What I'm saying is... if you are flirting with me I reject it.”

Meta sputtered, eyes widening with that same abject shock that PR’d displayed.

“That was not my intention, and I am not interested in you.”

“Why not.”

PR looked defensive now, crossing his arms and expectantly waiting for an adequate answer. The knight was too astonished to speak. The audacity of this man was astounding.

“Well, uh..” Meta looked for the words to say, but they disappeared from his throat. “I believe work and personal affairs should stay separate..? I am sure someone else would uh,  _ gladly  _ pick you up.”

He hoped that the most boring answer possible would be enough to sate PR’s weirdness. If he thought that Meta stating he looked young for his age was a flirt, he must’ve not gotten out very often. Or perhaps it was indicative of a deeper, more serious problem inside of PR’s brain that Meta had no right to pick at. 

If he found a good therapist during his stay, he would be sure to recommend them to PR. Even though he doubted any therapist would be able to properly unravel a man who’d— if PR wasn’t lying— been alive as long as he had.

There was a long silence before PR cleared his throat.

“Before all of this I used to be obsessed with TVs, the big clunky ones that you would roll into rooms and do a little gimmick.” PR said.

Meta was thankful he’d decided to change the subject, but it was such a random one that he was unsure the purpose of it. If PR was opening up to him, the guy even eNeMeE didn’t trust the allegiance of yet, about something important.. Maybe PR needed that therapist more than Meta initially thought.

“Before ‘all this’..?”

“Before I actually Became ‘PR’,” he took a deep breath and continued, “I was just a guy who would run around and fix TVs for people, then one day I just stopped and saw what was so interesting about them. The ads were something else, and I thought to myself; ‘I could do that but a whole lot better’.”

PR took a hard look at him.

“I know I was just a guy, that I’m certain of.”

A pause.

“What were you before all this.” The question is more of a command.

Meta Knight thought briefly.

“I was a soldier, that is all. Nothing else.”

“We’re friends here,” said PR, who was most definitely someone Meta would not associate with if he wasn’t forced to, “it’s not like I’m telling any of this to eNeMeE, telling him more about you would make his...  _ thing  _ worse.”

PR was blissfully unaware of the fact that eNeMeE knew every facet of Meta’s life as well as well as the knight himself did. If only such a naive assumption were genuinely true.

“Before I entered the war, I was a young engineer. My life was very normal, almost unremarkable.”

“Electrical or mechanical? I know there’s a difference.” 

“Mechanical.”

“Good. I can’t stand electrical engineers.”

“For what reason?”

“They always talk about numbers and stuff. It drives me up the wall.”

How intriguing that even PR would find certain individuals annoying.

“Very interesting.” Meta looked around the room, avoiding the floor popcorn as he headed to PR’s desk. “I can only assume how high up the wall you were when this room was designed.”

“I designed it myself.” Pr smacked the big lava lamp illuminating his office.

“It seems to be your style, much like the arcade you were in.”

“I commissioned it— the arcade. Well, I had to run it by the big boss of course.” PR looked to be reminiscing about something or other.

Meanwhile, Meta finally got a chance to put down the toy that PR had hucked him.

“You’ve spent a lot of time playing games, then.”

What other sort of person commissions a whole arcade if they don’t plan to play all the games? If PR was  _ truly  _ lazy, that would be helpful.

“All kinds.”

“So you are a.. Hmm.. ‘Gamer’?”

“If that were true then I guess we would all be gamers.”

“You had all the ‘highscores’ on that machine at the arcade.” Meta could only imagine a lifeless nobody dedicating that much time to something as menial as video games.

“It’s not like I dedicate my life to it,” said PR, who, again, had an arcade cabinet in his office, “I just happen to be radical at them. No one has ever come close to any of the scores that I get, so I just usually beat my own.”

PR was focused on something childish and a waste of time. Such a thing would be easily exploitable.

“A natural, then.” Meta gestured to his personal cabinet. “I am sure your cabinet there has nothing to do with it.”

“Well if I can trust you maybe you’ll find out one day.” PR smiled innocently.

That sentence was a red flag. There is something up with that video game machine. What in particular, Meta wasn’t sure, but he knew there was something more to it from that very, very strange and guarded reaction.

“Perhaps I will get the chance to see you play it one day, yes.”

“Maybe you could, but at the end of the day we are all stuck in this little game of life. Like the famous singer Nyatsune Meeku sang; ‘try to escape, why not try your luck and see what you may get?’” PR smiled, like he just said something insightful and beautiful.

Meta cringed.

“Yes, very  _ philosophical _ , Sir PR.”

* * *

After their much too long chat about the history of ‘Meocaloids’, Meta finally had the chance to escape PR’s strange room back into the realm of reality. Unfortunately, that also came with the cost of assisting a much, much worse individual with their own considerably worse mental acrobatics.

Meta had found eNeMeE again, in a large room known as the ‘command center’. A woman in a pink dress and large, floppy pink hat saw the knight and promptly excused herself, seemingly knowing of the storm that was soon to come.

“There you are! Finally! You don’t know how long I was sitting here, talking to suits and waiting for you.” 

eNeMeE lamented as he quickly made an effort to get more into Meta’s personal bubble the best he could, despite being multiple times taller than Meta. He was about as ‘inside’ his personal bubble as one’s shoe could be with an ant.

“I would have come sooner,” sure he would’ve, “but the person you’ve assigned to me held me up for non-work reasons.”

eNeMeE huffed in an almost understanding manner.

“He’s like that. He’s annoying, you don’t even know the half of how annoying he is because I’ve lived with him and you only just met him, but like, he’s loyal. So while I don’t like him, he’s reliable and all that.” eNeMeE pushed Meta further into the room with one of his claws, making him stumble slightly, but he still caught himself. “It’s a respectable trait.”

Loyalty was the only thing that kept eNeMeE from getting rid of PR, hm? Perhaps that was the same for all other employees here too.. 

“Loyalty doesn’t come easy nowadays, y’know, Meta Knight. Some people are like ‘ooohh you murdered my family’ or ‘oooohh why would I be loyal to someone who killed my whole race’ or other petty stuff like that. People who can have their loyalty just bought and sold, like most the employees here? Harder to come by than you think.”

He was more than aware of their rarity. Yamikage was a traitor, and he stuck out for it, but he was not the norm.

“I want to show you something.” eNeMeE snickered. “It’s a little sneak peek.” 

He forcefully turned Meta’s head to look at the display on the screen. A planet, simple enough. It was a large heart with a white ring around it, a cute face as well. It was a familiar planet, though the name escaped him at the moment.

“Nice planet, full of happy people. But you know what they did? They stayed out of the war. They didn’t help you at all, did they? No, they didn’t. Too flimsy and cowardly for that sort of thing, put a barrier ‘round their atmosphere, the whole shtick. Didn’t want to get involved. People like them are part of the reason you lost. Bystanders, civilians, unwilling idiots.”

eNeMeE gestured at the screen as he leaned forward slightly, if only to be more on Meta’s level. Not that he could be, being so high up.

“If it weren’t for them, maybe you could’ve won. I mean, that’s probably the reasoning that some people have, anyways. Other civilians, other cowards, the whole lot of them. These guys, they’re not like, special, but they’re indicative of a bigger problem.”

Meta held his tongue.

“May I ask what you are getting at, Lord eNeMeE.” A hot wave of defiant nausea racked his senses as he forced the words out.

“Do you hate them? Hate them for abandoning you, leaving you here, with me?” eNeMeE asked slowly and deeply, circling the topic sharkishly.

“No. Those who cannot fight should not fight, they would waste their lives.”

“But they’re able-bodied. Just because they say they can’t, doesn’t mean they shouldn’t. You, your friends, you could’ve been helped by people who didn’t want to help you.”

“I do not hate them.” The knight repeated.

eNeMeE purred, satisfied from what he was hearing. Meta felt himself reel from the pleased response, trying to think of what possibly could be running through the beast’s mind.

“If you don’t hate them, you’re not loyal to me. You still have some morals left in you, and why by no means I want them gone, you’re better with them. I like you having morals, it means you still have some fight left in you. Just don’t expect any special favors, uh, outside of the ones you already have, of course.”

If PR was to install loyalty in Meta Knight in some capacity, he’s going to try and whittle at Meta’s morals somehow. Key word being try, no way is it actually going to genuinely work. They’re definitely just going to force him to do awful things and think that’ll awaken some secret, sleeping hatred inside of him that doesn’t exist.

“I want you to see what happens to people who sit and watch while something horrible happens.” eNeMeE invited.

On the screen, monstrous ships made of flesh and blood whizzed towards the planet, accompanied by flying monsters. Dragons, birds, the whole like descended upon the poor, unsuspecting heart.

“Well?”

Meta knew what eNeMeE wanted and stayed silent. The beast kept a hearty chuckle inside his throat, and as Meta kept to himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [Please enjoy a complimentary chapter-relevant animatic made by Lavenderbirchtrees.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rj_25JME5jU)


End file.
